Wij houden van de drie sterren die primaire embleem van de Kappen het', vertegenwoordiger van de steun van het team in Maryland, het District, en Virginia begeleiden; for our third sweater we placed them on the shoulders, signifying the region’s hockey hopes carried on the team’s collective shoulders. We’d considered rotating them 90 degrees and having them run down the shoulder’s seam (a la the Caps’ classic sweater); let us know if you have strong feelings one way or the other about the stars’ placement.
  • Draw-string collaring was a must. The Caps have never had it; it hasn’t yet become so common a feature as to be cliche; and on a sweater design striving for a throwback, classic look, it seems like icing on the fashion cake.
  • So our final result is below. We strove for something more than minimalist, yet not cluttered. It is intended to represent the team and the region, and is hopefully something that would age well. But this is just one blogging team’s (admittedly fun) effort — we’re looking for your feedback, suggested improvements and, if you’re so inspired, perhaps your very own third sweater design posted as a comment.

    So in the spirit of Marvel Comics’ old “What If…” title, we hope you enjoy this concept of a Caps’ Sunday Sweater as much as we did designing it:

    Filed in Hockey Art, OFB, Old Time Hockey, Sweaters, Washington Capitals| Permalink| Comments (33)

    Boy and Girl First-Date at Caps’ Game, Make Life Together

    By The OFB Team
    Tuesday, July 29, 2008

    We never imagined that offering up a mere coffee mug would occasion the outpouring of superb reminiscence of Caps’ hockey memories that’s transpired here since last Friday. By Saturday night we needed two or three dozen mugs of honor to bestow. We don’t have that, but we are going to make multiple awards with our inaugural Free Loot Friday gift of OFB booty. In the dead of hockey-less summer, OFB readers by the dozens these past few days often gave us chills with their detail-rich strolls down Memory Lane.

    Your Cup'pa Joe tastes better with OFB.

    Your Cup'pa Joe tastes better with OFB.

    If you’re a Caps’ fan of any duration and you haven’t persued the comment thread for the competition, you really ought to. In addition to rich descriptions of seminal moments in the franchise’s history, there are loads of warm and moving testaments to the power and hold our game has had on the lives of the region’s puckheads. Under such circumstances, we were at pains to pull out merely one or two favorites; we hope that all of you who so generously shared such personal anecdotes realize that you’ve helped craft a lasting and memorable forum.

    We’ve long known the caliber of our puck-savvy reader, but never before has it been showcased in such quality and abundance in a single file. At least not here. This is what we’d hoped would happen here back in October of ‘06.

    So it was good, good fun. Certainly it helped bridge a bit of the hockey-less gap we’re presently enduring. Certainly we’ll be doing it again, next month.

    OFB reader Bill soon will sipping his morning joe out of an OFB coffee mug. This he shared with us last weekend:

    “. . . On December 11, 1976, against the short-lived Cleveland Barons (see California Golden Seals)(later to merge with the Minnesota North Stars)(later to move to Dallas). This particular night happened to be a “Date Night” promotion — for the cheapskates in the audience, buy one ticket, get one free for your date. A high school senior that winter, I of course took a lovely young lady out on our very first date that cold December evening to see the Caps play. The relationship that subsequently developed was far more successful than the on-ice results (sadly the Caps lost 4-2), with plans to celebrate our 27th wedding anniversary this coming season at Verizon Center cheering for a more successful result by the home team!”

    We’re such softies.

    Speaking of affairs of the hockey heart, check out joyfulleigh18’s poignant reflections on what the journey of the 2007-08 season meant to her life:

    “My most amazing hockey moment was a sad one. It was the very last second of our very last game this past season, a game that we lost and our Stanley Cup hopes were dashed for the year.

    “How on Earth could that be my best hockey moment? Allow me to explain.

    “This was my first year of hockey. My husband PJ (a life-long hockey fan) got us season tickets and I decided to go and do my best to understand what about this crazy sport he loved so much. During the preseason, almost no one showed up to the Verizon Center. “This is it?!?” I thought to myself. Pretty pathetic. But I did my best to follow along and learn the game. My goal became to figure out why the whistle would be blown and make the call before the ref did. I’d whisper “icing?” or “hooking?” to PJ and he’d either nod or correct me.

    “Sometime in early November I “saw” offsides for the first time. PJ had explained it to me about a million times, and while I could wrap my brain around the concept I still couldn’t “see” it because my eyes were following the puck instead of watching the whole ice at the same time. And then one day I just got it, and I’ve been able to see it ever since.

    “By Christmastime I knew all of the players and their strengths and weaknesses. I knew which ones I liked and which ones I didn’t. I encountered some guys at a bar one night and had an incredibly articulate and well-informed conversation with them about the Capitals. My husband stood by and watched with an amused and amazed expression on his face.

    “Little by little the Caps were getting better and better, and the Verizon Center seats were getting more and more full. As the playoffs approached, I found myself going online to figure out which other teams had to win and lose in order for us to be division champions and/or make the post-season. Of course, we made it, and I attended every game, wearing my red and yelling my head off. Those preseason games from last fall seemed so long ago. I was a different person then.

    “So back to the point (thanks, if you’ve stayed with my rambling story this far). On the last second of the last game of the season, as people started filing out of the Verizon Center with their heads lowered, I looked at my husband and quietly said, “I don’t want to leave. I don’t want hockey to be over.” And that’s when we both knew that I wasn’t just a hockey fan’s wife. I am a hockey fan in my own right.”

    Indeed you are, Leigh. With writing like that, you need a new mug for morning to help carry you through the next narrative, we think. We hope you share that with us just as you did this.

    And thank you all for sharing your most cherished Caps’ recollections.

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    Arbitration Ain’t About Summer Love

    By The OFB Team
    Tuesday, July 29, 2008

    In Tuesday’s Globe and Mail, James Mirtle uncovers the unpleasant side of the NHL’s arbitration system, in which clubs make the case that their player ain’t all that while the NHLPA suggests that the club pretty much can’t live without him. “When cases go to a hearing, they can often get ugly, as players, agents and teams fight for dollars under the salary cap,” Mirtle writes this morning. In Shaone Morrisonn’s case, ugly is the operative word.

    Morrisonn was awarded $1.975 million in his arbitration case this past Saturday, but according to Mirtle, “the Capitals offered several less than flattering assessments of Morrisonn, a stay-at-home defenceman who was fourth on the team in ice time last season.” As in:

    “Calling him “one-dimensional,” Washington argued that Morrisonn received substantial playing time in 2005-06 and 2006-07 on a weak team as a result of being “at the right place at the right time.”

    “Morrisonn’s agent, Mark Stowe, said negotiations before the hearing were extremely contentious.”

    Mirtle goes on to suggest that such acrimony is a principal reason why so many cases ultimately never make it to the actual arbitration hearing, citing most recently Jay Bouwmeester’s coming to terms with Florida for one year and $5 million. With hundreds of thousands — indeed millions — of dollars at stake, and under a cap-constrained environment, it’s understandable that the two sides would make the best possible cases for their respective positions. But that means some tough language on one side and all sweetness and light on the other.

    More from Mirtle on the inside of this messy moment:

    “In the Morrisonn case, the Capitals were seeking a salary of $1.1-million in arbitration and used six other young defencemen as comparables: Milan Jurcina, Josh Gorges, Lukas Krajicek, Mark Stuart, Garnet Exelby and Mike Komisarek.

    “On behalf of the player, the National Hockey League Players’ Association asked for $2.8-million and used Trevor Daley, Tim Gleason, Fedor Tyutin, Henrik Tallinder, Anton Volchenkov and Komisarek as comparisons.

    “In response to the club’s filing, the NHLPA argued that Morrisonn played a key role in the team’s Southeast Division championship under new coach Bruce Boudreau. Even though Morrisonn has had only five goals and 37 points over 234 games the past three seasons, the union said his contributions in his own zone and killing penalties justified a salary of nearly $3-million.

    “Unlike in major league baseball, where arbitrators choose between the salary proposed by either the player or his team, NHL arbitrators can use any salary they deem appropriate.

    “Ultimately, arbitrator Terry Bethel sided slightly with the union position in the Morrisonn case, awarding a contract that was almost directly between the figures sought by the sides. Bethel indicated the NHLPA’s comparison players were more appropriate, given Morrisonn’s experience and role with the Capitals, singling out Daley and Gleason as suitable matches.”

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    Mink’s Got a Link

    By pucksandbooks
    Monday, July 28, 2008

    Welcome to the hockey blogosphere, Graham Mink, 2006 Calder Cup hero. Mink, signed just a couple of weeks ago by the Caps and Hershey Bears, made his blog debut just this past weekend. If his opening efforts are any indication, this is a site you’ll want to follow regularly:

    “One of the major reasons why I started this blog was to give myself an outlet for all the excited energy I have in anticipation of this season. Anyone that has been following the Washington organization the past year knows that they are one of the up and coming teams in the league with a lot of positive energy surrounding them. Their rebuilding efforts over the last couple of years are finally paying off now that they have the right pieces in place. Having played for Coach Boudreau for the 05/06 season I know that this years Caps will be a very competitive team that will love to play every night and that will be fun to watch. I am also looking forward to seeing several old friends and teammates who are still with the organization. Seeing all of the great players that have signed on with Wash/Hershey for next season I know that regardless of which team I play for they will be a contender for a Championship.”

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    The Times Provides the Tale of the Tape on Caps’ Tickets

    By pucksandbooks
    Monday, July 28, 2008

    Strong stuff in the Times today from Tim Lemke, who documents the success the Caps have enjoyed this offseason in moving tickets for 2008-09. The base of ticket plan sales, Lemke reports, could approach 5,000, renewals from a season ago are at 91 percent and could climb higher, and Caps’ officials indicated that the season-ticket base could reach 12,000 — nearly a 40-percent increase over last season.

    “These guys are like [what] athletes used to act like,” said Patrick Rey, who attended one game last season. “You can’t not love these guys. They’re like a whole team of Brett Favres.” [Without the melodrama, we might add.]  

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    From Thrifty to Opulent in Three Seasons

    By The OFB Team
    Monday, July 28, 2008

    Here’s how cheap owner Ted Leonsis is right now: He’s got a $60 million hockey team here in town. The salary cap for next season has been set at $56 million, but there’s no penalty for being over the cap by 10 percent in the summer so long as a team is under it a week before the start of the season. The Caps most definitely are over the cap right now.

    At least they are saving money in net; after the Caps acquired Cristobal Huet from Montreal this past February they had nearly $10 million worth of backstoppers on the payroll — it’ll be a little over $5 million this season.

    Nine defensemen are on the books right now, but Brian Pothier’s $2.5 million is almost certain to come off, and General Manager George McPhee this summer has indicated that he won’t carry more than seven defenders. So two salaries are being lopped off from the blueline. And if Bruce Boudreau opts to keep 13 forwards out of camp, another salary would be sheared off from among the forward ranks.

    The Caps bought ought Ben Clymer this summer, but that means they take a modest salary hit for him this season and next.

    In the weeks ahead, McPhee must decide between two courses of action in plotting to get under the cap: (1) shear off enough to just get to $56 million, or (2) move bodies, or salaries, enough to afford himself some maneuverability during the season to address injuries that may arrive. Really the only way to achieve the second strategy is to move a large salary.

    Forwards
    Alexander Ovechkin 9,538,462
    Michael Nylander 4,875,000
    Alexander Semin 4,600,000
    Sergei Fedorov 4,000,000
    Chris Clark 2,633,333
    Viktor Kozlov 2,500,000
    Nicklas Backstrom 2,400,000
    Brooks Laich 2,066,667
    Donald Brashear 1,200,000
    Matt Bradley 1,000,000
    Eric Fehr 735,000
    Boyd Gordon 725,000
    Tomas Fleischmann 725,000
    David Steckel 512,500
    Ben Clymer 250,000
    Total 37,760,962
    Defensemen
    Mike Green 5,250,000
    Tom Poti 3,500,000
    Brian Pothier 2,500,000
    Shaone Morrisonn 1,975,000
    Karl Alzner 1,675,000
    Milan Jurcina 881,250
    Jeff Shultz 750,000
    Sami Lepisto 700,000
    John Erskine 537,500
    Total 17,768,750
    Goaltenders
    Jose Theodore 4,500,000
    Brent Johnson 812,500
    Total 5,312,500
    Team Total 60,842,212

    How would you rate McPhee’s roster and salary management this summer? He had a large number of new contracts to negotiate, and he had unexpected breakout seasons from the likes of Mike Green and Brooks Laich driving up his payroll. He also may not have anticipated Sergei Fedorov making the impact he did in just a couple of months’ time, making a new deal for him a wise idea. Lastly, he endured player agent mischief from Cristobal Huet’s representative. When all was said and done, he managed to ink every player he wanted from last season, save Huet, and do so before August 1. How many GMs can make that claim?

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    More Ammunition for Finley To Go Pro

    By pucksandbooks
    Sunday, July 27, 2008

    The last two weeks have seen two more members of the North Dakota Fighting Sioux sign pro hockey contracts. Senior defenseman Robbie Bina inked a deal with Edmonton this week, and earlier this month, senior Kyle Radke signed with the Idaho Steelhounds of the ECHL.

    Five members of the Fighting Sioux have signed pro hockey contracts this summer. In addition to Bina and Radke, Taylor Chorney (Edmonton), Rylan Kaip (Atlanta), and T.J. Oshie (St. Louis) have all departed. The Sioux also lost starting netminder Jean-Philippe Lamoureux to graduation.

    Perhaps Caps’ prospect Joe Finley had designs on visiting Verizon Center as a senior next April for the Frozen Four. It’s hard to see that happening now. Indeed, Inside College Hockey’s 10 teams to watch for 2008-09 didn’t include the Sioux, before this month’s defections.

    So BigJoe, what’s the holdup on starting your pro career?

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    The NHL Has Not Changed Boudreau

    By OrderedChaos (Mike Rucki)
    Saturday, July 26, 2008
    AP Photo/The Canadian Press, Frank Gunn

    AP Photo/The Canadian Press, Frank Gunn

    Washington Capitals Head Coach Bruce Boudreau today is in Niagra Falls, Ont., volunteering at the Hockey Resume Free Agent Camp. Hockey Resume helps out-of-work hockey players land minor league tryouts and, hopefully, contracts.

    One might think Boudreau is graciously volunteering his time — returning from the NHL to his hard-fought minor league days, perhaps — but Boudreau, ever ready with a wisecrack, revealed the true reason for his appearance at the camp:

    “I’m basically doing it so my son doesn’t have to pay,” Boudreau said. “They wanted something like 400 bucks (actually $325) for the camp and I said I’d help out with a practice and give their camp some validity if my son could attend for free. I did the same thing at the Roger Neilson Hockey Camp last week for my other son.”

    Check out Ken Campbell’s blog at The Hockey News for more.

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    All Aboard! Capitals Sign Shaone Morrisonn

    By OrderedChaos (Mike Rucki)
    Saturday, July 26, 2008

    The Washington Capitals’ final outstanding contract situation is resolved: Shaone Morrisonn was awarded a 1-year contract via arbitration according to the Capitals’ press release. The Caps’ 10 leading scorers from the 2007-08 regular season are now under contract for the upcoming season.

    Morrisonn, 25, played his third full season with the Capitals in 2007-08, recording 10 points (one goal, nine assists) and 63 penalty minutes in 76 games. He had a +4 plus/minus rating, including a +14 mark in the 55 games under head coach Bruce Boudreau. Morrisonn finished fourth on the team with an average of 20:16 of ice time per game. Morrisonn played in all seven Capitals playoff games, despite suffering a broken jaw, and recorded one assist.

    The contract, worth $1.975 million per Katie Carrera at Capitals Insider, shores up the Caps’ top defensive pairing. With Morrisonn back patrolling the Capitals’ blue line, one hopes that the chemistry between Morrisonn and Mike Green leads to even better things for the pair this season.

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    Caps-Flyers Playoff Coverage on the NHL Network This Weekend

    By The OFB Team
    Saturday, July 26, 2008

    July sports television — yeah, we’re with you in the agony of unappealing programming choices. But the NHL Network is helping out Caps’ fans this weekend. Right this moment it’s offering up Game 5 of the Caps-Flyers first-round series from April. Tonight at 7:00 fans can settle in with game 6.

    That prime-time affair offers a very appealing bit of Flyer fan silencing from #8 at the 2:46 mark of the third period.

    For early risers, Game 5 will air again Sunday morning at 7:00. And game 7, contested on Verizon Center’s mush, airs as a weekend culminating bit of torture at 7:00 Sunday night.

    Hey, it sure beats Arena Football, and we never tire of seeing, and hearing, the Sea of Red.

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    Devin Thomas, Profile in Courage

    By pucksandbooks
    Saturday, July 26, 2008

    OFB wishes a speedy recovery to Redskins’ rookie wide receiver Devin Thomas, who was carted off the training camp field this week with a strained hamstring.

    No timetable has been established for his return.

    We presume that Capitals’ center Boyd Gordon is well mended from his own groin injury — he competed in the Stanley Cup playoffs this spring with a torn groin.

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    Introducing Free Loot Friday

    By The OFB Team
    Friday, July 25, 2008
    Your Cup'pa Joe tastes better with OFB.

    Your Cup'pa Joe tastes better with OFB.

    Over some summertime puck sodas, we thought we would lift a page from a very popular (non-sports) blog. Now we don’t have a Wii Fit to give away, but we do have some cool stuff in the OFB Store.

    Periodically — perhaps the final Friday of every month — we are going to give away some of our booty to an OFB reader. Think of it as a thank you for helping make OFB the fun forum that it is today. We thought it would be appropriate that our first giveaway would be an OFB coffee mug — the perfect accompaniment to your morning cup’pa joe. May we also recommend a weekend additive to said joe.

    Here is how the inaugural Free Loot Friday will work. In the comments section of this post, tell us about your favourite / most memorable moment as a Caps’ fan. It can be from this past season, your first season as a fan, or any time in between including the cup-run season of ‘98. We’ll accept comments until Monday, July 28th at 5:00 pm EDT. We will randomly select a qualified comment and mail you an OFB branded coffee mug*. Be sure to use a real working address in your email field of your comment so that we can notify you in the event that you are the winner.

    * OFB Staff and their immediate families are not elligible for Free Loot Friday.

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    Rockin’ the NHL Awards Red Carpet Red: “It’s always Ovie time”

    By The OFB Team
    Friday, July 25, 2008

    Here’s a great video from HockeyBarn.com — one in which stellar cameos feature Comcast’s Lisa Hillary, owner Ted Leonsis, Head Coach Bruce Boudreau, Calder candidate Nicklas Backstrom, some Ovechkin fella, and Caps’ media maestro Nate Ewell doing real good by a monkey suit. Enjoy.

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    A Flower in Bloom but a Single Night Washed Away by Wild Winds and Rain

    By pucksandbooks
    Thursday, July 24, 2008
    Photo by Allen Clark / Off Wing Photo

    Photo by Allen Clark / Off Wing Photo

    Washington isn’t a city of vertical architecture, but among the 10- and 12-story office buildings and hotels surrounding the new professional team tennis stadium, home of the Washington Kastles, dozens of men could be seen standing out on terraces, verandas, rooftops, or pressed hard against office glass looking down and out onto the tennis court Wednesday night. More than a few were armed with binoculars.

    Really hardcore tennis fans, perhaps? What, you didn’t know that D.C. is mad about its Wednesday night professional team tennis — so much so that $500-an-hour attorneys billing from on high would stop their labor (but not necessarily their billing) and catch a bit of the Kastles?

    Ok, so maybe, just maybe, Anna Kournikova’s arrival in Washington with the St. Louis Aces had a little to do with the single-gender spying from on high.

    Wednesday night I was all prepared to pursue this storyline at Kastles Stadium at CityCenterDC: whose arrival in Washington this year was the bigger news occasion, Pope Benedict’s or Kournikova’s?

    Continue reading here.

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    That Other Russian Competing This Summer

    By The OFB Team
    Thursday, July 24, 2008
    Ovechkin Stretching - photo by Pavel Lysenkov

    Ovechkin Stretching - photo by Pavel Lysenkov

    Dovgan Ovechkin & Kapitonov training - Photo by Pavel Lysenkov

    Dovgan Ovechkin & Kapitonov training - Photo by Pavel Lysenkov

    Ovechkin and Dovgan - photo by Pavel Lysenkov

    Ovechkin and Dovgan - photo by Pavel Lysenkov

    Ovechkin on the

    Ovechkin on the Electric Chair - photo by Pavel Lysenkov

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    Dates for Camping

    By The OFB Team
    Wednesday, July 23, 2008

    The Capitals today announced dates for fall camp. Rookies and prospects will arrive at Kettler Capitals for workouts that begin on September 14. Regular training camp will commence on Saturday, September 20.

    A highlight of September’s training sessions will be a scrimmage between Washington’s rookies and Philadelphia’s, at Kettler, at 3:00 on Thursday, September 18 — the first of its kind at the Capitals’ training facility. The game will be free for fans but will require a ticket for admission, with the team to announce protocols for that at a later date.

    All of September’s on-ice sessions will be free and open to the public.

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    How Anna Kournikova Ruled a Nation’s Lusting Hearts (and Modems)

    By OrderedChaos (Mike Rucki)
    Wednesday, July 23, 2008
    Anna Kournikova (photo: Walter Iooss, 2008)

    Anna Kournikova (photo: Walter Iooss Jr, 2008)

    For our younger readers — and those who’ve been hit in the head with a puck once too often to remember — let’s take a fond, retrospective, lingering look at Anna Kournikova as she visits our fair city with the St. Louis Aces to face the Washington Kastles. I suspect very few male readers will mind this brief diversion from the melting asphalt of our nation’s capital today . . . and of course this is purely a public service, not just an excuse to search for Anna K photos without my wife giving me the evil eye. Really.

    Anna Kournikova burst onto the tennis scene at 16 as a striking and talented newcomer; yet her tennis career faded as her celebrity increased. Something that many forget in the glare of paparazzi flashbulbs: she peaked as the 8th-ranked female player in the world in 2000 — no mean feat. So while the media attention she received was disproportionate to her tennis success, she undoubtedly had talent on the court. But it was her beauty and the accompanying rumor mill that made her such a popular icon.

    In 2001, there were even rumors that Kournikova might hit the big screen as the next Bond Girl. As it turns out, no. But the idea was rife with Bond-ian double entendre name opportunities (or just single entendres) . . . Dr. Goodstroke? Anita Tourvin? Ivana Scorealot? The possibilities are endless.

    Now the heiress to the Russian tennis hotness throne, Maria Sharapova, has herself expressed interest in being a Bond Girl (as well as interest in the new 007 Daniel Craig). It seems the spy game still has some luster in the former Soviet Union.

    Kournikova proactively pursued her outsized popularity: she’s obliged, seemingly, every photo shoot request from Maxim to FHM to Sports Illustrated’s swimsuit issue. She was ranked as one of People Magazine’s ‘50 Most Beautiful People’ in 1998, 2000, 2002, and 2003. She did not avoid the spotlight, and it did not avoid her.

    By 2003, she achieved the unprecedented status of most downloaded female athlete on the Internet, in the relatively short history of that new medium. We’ve yet to learn of her being bettered in that feat. According to Forbes.com, there were more than 18,000 web pages “devoted to her backhand and back end” in ‘03.

    It’s rather easy to understand her starburst: her arrival coincided with the Internet’s maturation in graphics and multimedia — after all, Web surfers searching for Anna were not “reading the articles.”

    Beefcake to balance the cheesecake

    Daniel Craig, 007: Equal-time beefcake photo to balance the scales

    But the biggest Kournikova story — and the most hockey-related as well — was her predilection for Russian hockey greats. Kournikova and Washington Capital Sergei Fedorov (then with Detroit of course) started as friends, married while she was a teen, then divorced soon after the kerfuffle over her connection with Pavel Bure. There was a time when both Fedorov and Bure claimed to be engaged to Kournikova . . . at the same time. Yet it was Fedorov, not Bure, who married the tennis star, albeit briefly. Chalk up another big win for Fedorov!

    Much was made at the time of the significant age difference between Fedorov and Kournikova (the tabloids branded her a “Tennis Lolita”); even Fedorov attributed some of their split to the age gap: “We were just so much apart, and those [emotions] when you are falling in love, at such a young age … it was just impossible because I was a little bit older, I think.”

    Apparently Sergei and Anna are no longer close, so it is unlikely that he will make an appearance at tonight’s event. But if you catch a glimpse of other Russian hockey hopefuls lurking in the background, don’t be surprised. Hmm . . . I’ve played hockey . . . perhaps I can pass as Mikhail Ruckov for a day? Da Zvidanya!

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    Lust, 15 . . . no 30, no 40: A Hockey Blogger Warms to the Tennis Beat

    By pucksandbooks
    Tuesday, July 22, 2008

    You might ask, what business is it of a hockey blog to cover a team tennis match? I might reply, forgive me for wanting to chronicle . . . a legend!

    Legends are forged both by championship mettle and star-crossed curses. Greg Norman is a legend more for his losing than his winning. And so it is with our sensational starlet from SovetskyLand. So there.

    It is an interesting time — some would say fortuitous — to be on the tennis beat. Tennis pro Ashley Harkleroad is in the news, nude. I go on a new beat and on day one I discover that the young, fit, and hard-bodied with rackets in their hands are running around in the buff.

    Tennis, anyone?

    Harkleroad’s reputed inspiration for extreme exposure in the August Playboy struck me as peculiar: it arrived in tandem with her recovery from an ovarian cyst procedure. How many sinus infections lead to new nose jobs?

    She is the first professional tennis player to appear in Playboy, birthday suited. The only other pro athlete likewise unlayered there was swimmer Amanda Beard. For some reason I really wish puck daddy had been around when Ms. Beard took her dip in Playboy’s warmer waters. As it is, I’m saving a seat for him at tomorrow’s Anna K presser.

    But who is Ashley Harkleroad? Good question. She’s not in the top 10 rankings of women’s professional tennis; in fact, she’s not in the top 50. Like Anna Kournikova, she made a precocious if palpitating first impression on court: her appearance at the 2001 U.S. Open, in extra tight shorts and a midriff-baring top, is said to have “paralyzed the ball boys.”

    Tennis, anyone?

    Actually, I don’t feel wholly alien to the endeavor of entering tennis journalism. Around the time I was 15, I thought rather seriously of authoring a coffee table book worshipping Canadian tennis star Carling Bassett, of the Carling O’Keefe brewery family. A hottie Canuck who’d never have to pay for our beers.

    Tennis, anyone?

    Anyway, Harkleroad, at the onset of this decade, was marketed-hyped as “the next Anna,” and like Anna, she hasn’t won much. She’s 23, and in tennis years — particularly on the women’s side — that’s getting up there if you haven’t won a tournament. It may be with this competitive sunset settling in that Harkleroad devined the inspiration to go streaking about the tennis court.

    What if OnFrozenBlog morphed in summers into, say . . . OntheBaselinewithBabes?

    A child of the ’70s, I vividly recall the “boom” tennis experienced then. In greater Washington, as in many parts of the country, recreational tennis courts were jammed, day in and day out. That’s hard to fathom today for anyone under 30, looking out over the vast empty fenced-in courts of today, but it’s positively true. It was a surreal time, with anecdotes of fights breaking out among tennis moms over access to courts.

    So tennis knew this golden moment in America, and then, without rhyme or reason, it busted. To the point where today it’s all about (exposed, highlighted) busts. To this day I’m not sure why, and I’ve never read an attempt to explain it. Suddenly, everybody just started playing golf, clogging the courses and emptying out the courts. And it’s been that way for two-plus decades.

    Anna Kournikova, however, seemed to be the helium for tennis’ flaccid air balloon. But she never ascended into the clouds of acclaim . . . for her play.

    I’ve yet to hear anyone in tennis’ leadership articulate, in the mainstream press, a sense of what kind of conditions are needed to replicate the ’70s tennis boom. It happened once; is it the case that it can never happen again? If so, why?

    It is money? Are other pro sports so ludicrously well-heeled by TV and sponsors that kids won’t pick up a racket? That seems too cynical a theory.

    But who today in the hierarchy of American tennis is working on a Manhattan Project to revitalize tennis to something approaching its glory of three decades ago? Is anyone?

    Or, is the sport’s leadership altogether passive and content to pimp out the sport’s popularity to the pinups of the moment?

    (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)

    (See you at “Guy’s Night Out” Wednesday.)

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    Toronto Adds Hunter, Zettler as Assistant Coaches

    By OrderedChaos (Mike Rucki)
    Tuesday, July 22, 2008

    No, not Dale Hunter . . . Tim Hunter and Rob Zettler have been sucked into The Great Toronto Void, a.k.a. Leafs Nation, as assistant coaches. Zettler patrolled the Washington blue line from 1999-2002 (with a couple stints in Portland). Hunter was the Capitals’ assistant coach for 5 years, including the team’s run to the Stanley Cup in 1998.

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    Fedorov II Returns to the NHL

    By OrderedChaos (Mike Rucki)
    Tuesday, July 22, 2008

    The New Jersey Devils have signed Fedor Fedorov, Sergei’s younger brother. Fedor spent last year with Dynamo Moscow, tallying 26 points in 49 games.

    The Devils visit the Phone Booth twice this season (Oct. 18, Nov. 14).

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    We Are Readying Ourselves for Her Arrival in D.C.

    By The OFB Team
    Tuesday, July 22, 2008

    Knowing our of association with Russia’s largest sports daily, SovetskySport, the Most Valuable Network approached us this week and asked if we’d accept an assignment few who know outdoor sporting events in July in D.C. would even consider: sitting beneath a searing sun, skin clammy with Mid-Atlantic humidity, and blogging . . . on tennis, as played by Russia’s Anna Kournikova. Wednesday night, Kournikova and her St. Louis Aces tennis team strut into CityCenterDC to face our Washington Kastles.

    Initially, of course, we begged off the assignment, pointing to our fidelity, our monogamy, with but one sport. Also: we know less about tennis — team or any other version — than we do about quantum physics. But Washington today is a special destination for elite Russian athletes, and from some cursory investigative work this week we learned that that nation produces notably gifted female tennis players as well as sick-skilled hockey players. And these Russian hockey players have a way of attaching themselves to beautiful female athletes in other sports, including tennis, or to American fashion supermodels, and so we began to regard the MVN assignment as an opportunity to learn more about this distinctive culture — and share the edifying experience with our readers. Really, we’re doing this for you, dear blog reader.

    It is also true that we are willing to do anything to help draw media attention away from the Washington Redskins at this time of year.

    The assignment calls for us to attend a press conference with her hotness late Wednesday afternoon, take perch among the tennis press for the St. Louis-Washington team match that evening, and bring readers here and at MVN OFB’s unique flavor of new media coverage.

    Our aim is simple: to shed light on a strikingly fit world-class athlete thus far little known to users of the Internet.

    Because OFB is animated by the collective spirit comprised in its patronage, we welcome with your comments here your suggestions for coverage of this Starry Night in SportsWashington.

    Remembering that OFB is a family-read blog, what would you ask Anna if you could put but a single question to her?

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