Gene Weingarten is a syndicated humor columnist for the Washington Post who holds a weekly chat on washingtonpost.com titled “Chatological Humor aka Tuesdays With Moron“.
We find the alternate title more fitting. Here’s an excerpt from the Dec 4th Chat:
Brooklyn, N.Y.: Re: “I find Hockey totally ridiculous”:
Gene Weingarten - Tuesdays With MoronGene, you’ve always impressed me as someone who can find beauty in unexpected places. You’re overlooking a big one here. Alex Ovechkin of the Caps is a once-in-a-lifetime hockey player, and he happens to be right in Washington. Not going to check him out once or twice while he’s here would be like not going to see a Van Gogh exhibit the Smithsonian got on loan.
Or, from the safety of your chair: I challenge you to search on “Ovechkin” at YouTube and say his goals are scored by accident. (I’ll even spot you his most theatrical goal.)
Gene Weingarten: Okay, I just looked at his highlight reel. Very impressive. But I have gone to two Caps games (at ridiculous prices) and in each, the majority of goals were scored in the following fashion:
A scrum of guys from both teams race toward the goal, some of theme forwards, some backwards. When they arrive at the crease, they coalesce into a flailing, flopping mass, the puck somewhere within this mayhem. And at the last minute it sort of pops out and floops into the goal.
Sorry. I know to some this sounds like idiocy; I’m just a casual sports fan callng it as I see it.
I don’t much love soccer, but you can watch it and realize there is artistry involved. I just can’t see it here, at least not in a sustained fashion. Also, I have no idea what “icing the puck” is
Union Station, Washington, D.C.: Over priced Caps tickets? Lemme guess, you were sitting downstairs by the glass. If you don’t mind being upstairs you can get a ticket for ten bucks. A lot of the time the upper deck isn’t full so you can “upgrade” yourself latter in the game.
And yes, the crashing the net routine does tend to work a lot. Part of the beauty of the game is how intense it can get.
washingtonpost.com: And hockey is more interesting and sensible from up in the cheap seats.
Gene Weingarten: Yaaaawn.
Stumble it!
15 Comments
“Yaaaaawn”. I have that reaction when I read Weingarten’s column. Dave Barry, he ain’t.
And, to any of you 400 level schmucks who think its ok to “upgrade” to the lower bowl without paying have another thing coming. You’re basically stealing. If you’re out of town and your house is better than mine, I can’t just use it while you aren’t there. And besides, the Caps are so bad, you’re better off up there anyway.
Yawn. Tell that to the Capitals brass who would love to have the stands appear fuller than they really are, especially in the third period when the game may be out of reach (in either direction).
Sneaking down there before the third period may be asking for trouble, but after the second halftime? No one is going to show up for the game that late.
Personally, I have never done this, but that is because I am so lazy, I rarely move at all during the game.
I’ve never heard of Weingarten, but I’m never impressed when columnists talk about things that they really aren’t familiar with. We can all agree he doesn’t know much about hockey.
While it’s too bad he didn’t like the games he went to, his reaction to it says more about HIM than it does about HOCKEY.
“Yaaaaaaaawn”
Brilliant! Comedic genius! I can see why this man is syndicated humor writer for a living!
Well put Buttercup (and all). I’ve always seen Weingarten as a poor (or homeless) man’s Dave Barry. I was surprised that he came across as so peevish when hockey was the subject… though perhaps he’s the same way with other topics and I just haven’t noticed because I’m not invested in his other targets like I am in hockey.
I acknowledge the fact that many people don’t like hockey.
I just don’t see the need to belittle them for their opinion, even if I don’t share it.
I can’t stand basketball. And I wouldn’t want pro-hoops people trying to shove it down my throat and telling me how I “don’t get it.”
remember the lard lad, people. you ignore them, they’ll go away.
Very true. “Just don’t look! Just don’t look!”
odessa (and others who bristle, seemingly regularly, at our criticism of the MSM): we didn’t pick a fight with Weingarten this week, or Wilbon last, because of their “individual” distastes for hockey. What a private individial thinks of the Caps or hockey in general is irrelevant to us. The point is that these individuals are far from private citizens, and in fact community influencers of disproportionate perch. It’s fine if is hockey is #112 on their list of things to patronize in D.C. as Washingtonians; it’s something far different, however, in their professional capacities as sports media in a town of just a handful of pro teams. Again, you just don’t see this invective penned by the sportswriters toward a pro team in genuine sports towns, and it’s tragic and disheartening and in our opinion unprofessional.
I think it’s fine if people with professional capacities and public personas don’t like hockey (or baseball or soccer or whatever).
It’s just unfortunate that time and time again they have to emphasize how little they like the sport or how little they understand or know about it.
If you don’t like it, fine. Shut the heck up.
That’s one of the perpetuating cycles of hockey locally. Wilbon, Kornheiser, Weingarten have to lip off about it. Some people read and value what they have to say. So naturally some people are poisoned to the idea as a result. It’s basically become trendy to badmouth the sport.
Save your words, diatribes, drivel, sermons, wisdom etc for those subjects that you do care about and are passionate about.
If hockey is not one of those, great, just don’t belittle it because you don’t get it. Talk about other things.
Nicely stated, Grooven, and I’m afraid there’s a great deal of truth to your speculation regarding the impact of the poison.
Yeah, guys like Weingarten think that hockey is a wannabe sport and want to put hockey “in its place.” unfortunately, weingarten’s view is superficial at best. i still remember the first football game I watched. i found the game incomprehensible. appreciation for a sport does not develop in an instant. i am not dissing football, just pointing out that weingarten’s remarks reflect what i think is a deep biais, and not any actual attempt to understand the game.
I have season tickets in section 414 and I would never move down. In my mind the upper seats are better (and yes, I have sat in the lower sections). You get a better look at the whole surface, and frankly, I like being able to see all the way down the boards.
I don’t discuss religion, diets, expensive beer or effective courtships for one common reason: those topics confuse me. I’d suggest Weingarten establish a similar routine.
Its interesting to consider Moron’s comments in light of the view many mainstream US media types share that the NHL would generate a bigger following stateside if only it eliminated fighting altogether. It would seem that even if such were to happen, guys like Moron would apparently still view hockey as a “flailing, flopping mass” of skaters.
By the way, I couldn’t find the verb “floop” in my dictionary, Moron.
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