05 September, 2008

The Pain and Suffering Index

ESPN’s Page 2 debuted their Pain and Suffering formula today for the four major sports. The writers calculate just how much misery has been inflicted upon a given team’s fans (any team that won its sport’s championship in the past twenty-five years is excluded), then list the 46 most aggrieved fan bases.

The Flyers come in at #3 overall, the highest (lowest?) ranked NHL team. The Caps make an appearance on the list as well . . . with a bonus Jagr Mullet photo:

30. WASHINGTON CAPITALS

Last title: Never Seasons: 31 Playoffs: 18 Winning seasons: 18 Finals losses: 1 (1)

The worst team ever? The Capitals joined the NHL in 1974, and let us pray we never see a team this bad again. They finished 8-67-5 and won just one road game. They were outscored 446-181. Apparently, the Hanson brothers were unavailable.

Not quite a soul-sucking moment but much worse than a kick to the groin: The Caps were strong through the ’80s, making the playoffs every year from ‘83 to ‘96. But their playoff heartbreak was best defined by the famous Easter Epic first-round loss to the Islanders in 1987. The teams were meeting for the fifth straight year in the playoffs, but the Caps took a 3-1 series lead. New York forced Game 7, which was broadcast on ESPN on Saturday night before Easter … but the game wouldn’t end until Easter morning, when the Islanders’ Pat Lafontaine finally scored the winner in the fourth overtime.

P & S rating: 3.00 (equivalent to six Jaromir Jagrs)
Misery Capitals - from ESPN.comMisery Capitals - from ESPN.comMisery Capitals - from ESPN.comMisery Capitals - from ESPN.comMisery Capitals - from ESPN.comMisery Capitals - from ESPN.com

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2 Comments

  1. Stimpy wrote:

    Wow, my three teams are all in the top 30!
    Cubs (23), Vikings (27), Caps. I’ll have to look into B-ball and pick a team on the list.

    Thursday, March 29, 2007 at 9:39 am | Permalink
  2. The Easter disaster is pretty high on the list of the worst moments in my life.

    Thursday, March 29, 2007 at 10:10 am | Permalink

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