This morning I feel compelled to issue the season’s first NC-17 rating to a hockey game. Late tonight the 3-12-2 Philadelphia Flyers visit the 13-1-4 Anaheim Mighty Ducks.
V-chips, for the sake of the children.
It’s understandable that Caps’ fans would channel the bulk of their puck energies and enthusiasm to the marvelously unimaginable 8-5-4 offering of the home team, and yet in my judgment we nourish our hockey souls incompletely, in fast food fashion, in failing to pause, and break dance, at the train wreck a mere 90 miles or so north. My favorite reaction to the black mass for the Orange and Black originated at hockeysfuture, just hours after the purging of the coach and GM, on the Flyers’ message board there, in a thread titled Describe the Team in Pictures.
I thought I might share with you, dear Flyer-loathing reader, a few of my favorite jpegs from that Pulitzer-worthy thread.
The first is a time-honored attack on the general condition of Flyer goaltending:
And if it can be said that for much of the past decade-plus the Flyers have resided in or near the league’s penthouse, today they lodge here:
The general mobility of the Flyers’ blueline corps leaves a bit to be desired in its representation here:
Scapegoating, though, is reactionary, knee-jerk, the stuff of foaming sportstalk radio; better to spread the blame around, and include the Flyers’ forwards, whose offensive firepower, in what is my favorite image offering of the thread, evokes this sculpture:
And last but by far not least, the Flyers’ habit of surrendering the puck under unimpressive duress is best associated by a turnover machine:
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5-2 Flyers after the first period.
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